17-year-old sister left furious after her 23-year-old brother's girlfriend keeps wearing her clothes without permission, brother claims it's a hassle to make her pack more, their mother refuses to get involved: 'I told him it made me uncomfortable'

Author image for Emma Saven
Emma Saven
Aug 5, 2025 6:00 PM EDT

It's natural girl-code to let a 'sister' in need borrow your things. 

Whether it be clothes, make up or even a hairbrush, most girls are generally quite generous. However, that does not always mean that there is this unspoken entitlement to other people's possessions simply down to the rules of sisterhood. 

Another thing, if someone says yes once or twice to lending their items, unless you've literally grown up together, it doesn't mean that you are forever granted access to whatever you desire, especially if you aren't quite there yet. 

So this generous sister is fed up after days of seeing her brother's girlfriend walk around covered from head to toe in her clothing. Yes, she said on day one she could borrow a T-shirt…but this is one step too far, even the silent laws of sisterhood would gasp!

Okay, girl! If you're too lazy to pack a bag or are even just a pretty useless planner, then ask your boyfriend for some tracks, but you can't just walk around the house like you own whatever's inside. 

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  • So how does one tiptoe around this situation without making the house a place of deafening tension?

    She's tried talking to her mother, but that backfired. She's tried talking to her brother, but shocker, he just didn't see the issue. So maybe, the only person left to confront is his oblivious girlfriend directly…

    Because without boundaries, first it starts with his sister’s Brandy sweater, but the next thing you know, she’s driving his dad’s Audi and facetiming his mom’s therapist!

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    Cheezburger Image 10538141440
    via yevhen

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    AITA for saying it's inappropriate that my brother’s girlfriend keeps wearing my clothes?

    I (17F) live at home with my mom and brother (23M). His girlfriend (23F) has started staying over more often, like multiple nights a
    via MajesticDevice8908
  • 03
    week. I'm not judging that part too much, she's great but what's really bothering me is that she keeps wearing my clothes.
    via MajesticDevice8908
  • 04
    The first few times it was with permission and I'd agreed and lent her my stuff but now I'll just wake up and see her walking
    via MajesticDevice8908
  • 05
    around the kitchen wearing one of my shirts like it's normal. I never said she could freely take anything.
    via MajesticDevice8908
  • 06
    When I brought it up to my brother he said it'd be a hassle to make her pack more stuff, that it's just a nice way to make her feel
    via MajesticDevice8908
  • 07
    more welcomed and at home, and that it'd be even more inappropriate for her to wear his clothes around the house.
    via MajesticDevice8908
  • 08
    Okay??? how is that my problem? I'm not her closet. Idk why she doesn't just wear my mom's too. I told him it made me
    via MajesticDevice8908
  • 09
    uncomfortable, especially because there's something intimate about her wearing my stuff and it reminds me that she's
    via MajesticDevice8908
  • 10
    sleeping in his bed and I don't want to picture that. Honestly it just feels kinda gross. Our mom is staying out of it, she
    via MajesticDevice8908
  • 11
    Cheezburger Image 10538134016
    via rossandhelen

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 12
    didn't disagree with me but idk if she sees it the same way I do or just doesn't care. EDIT: yes I have a lock on my door, but not all of my clothes are
    via MajesticDevice8908
  • 13
    in my closet- mine and everyone else's overflow clothes are all folded in the laundry room which is accessible to anyone. I know I'll have to tell her directly soon and
    via MajesticDevice8908
  • 14
    suggest what ppl have been commenting about leaving her own clothes here. I just hate feeling like I'm gonna be starting drama bc nobody else in the house sees my issue.
    via MajesticDevice8908
  • 15
    china_aa If she is going to come over/ stay over so much. She should start BRINGING her own clothes... Like what the heck??? Does she not have shame or feel weird in someone else's clothes???
    via china_aa
  • 16
    FeedsBlackBats ΝΤΑ You're going to have to bypass your brother and go straight to the girlfriend. Tell her that you don't appreciate her taking your clothes without asking. How is she even accessing your clothes?
    via FeedsBlackBats
  • 17
    UnSleeping Moss "Stop using my clothing. I never gave you permission." State it like that and if she continues, tell her to return it or you'll consider it stolen property.
    via UnSleepingMoss
  • 18
    whatevsjustreading NTA. What in the heck. No one's entitled to your clothes and the excuses are so weak. Anywhere gf goes, she needs to make sure she has enough clothes..
    via whatevsjustreading
  • 19
    Telly94 NTA. She should absolutely be asking before she takes anything. Tell your brother they're gonna have to deal with the hassle of her packing more stuff and tell your mom you want a lock for your stuff.
    via Telly94
  • 20
    ObfusKate NTA if your brother thinks it will make her feel more welcomed, he can have her wear his stuff or she can leave some of her own clothes in his room.
    via ObfusKate_
  • 21
    Charming-Bike-427 NTA. I accidentally wore my boyfriend's dads hoodie because they worked at the same place and it was the same exact hoodie. Once I realized after a while it was smaller I was horrified. You are right, it is intimate and not okay unless there is permission.
    via Charming-Bike-427
  • 22
    MadQueenBecca uhh it's more weird she's wearing your clothes than his - why does he think that's strange? fine they'll be oversized on her but she should have her own clothes if she cares that much. NTA you better say something before she steals them properly
    via MadQueenBecca
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    Cheezburger Image 10538142720
    via Anastasia Shuraeva

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 24
    kiltedswine NTA. Your mother should be supporting you and your obviously healthy boundaries. She may be TAH.
    via kiltedswine
  • 25
    cathtray NTA Try "Hey Visitor, will you at least check with me before you raid my wardrobe? I'm sure brother told you it was fine, but it makes me uncomfortable."
    via cathtray

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locking taking-without-permission FAIL lock-door brother mother supportive closet Awkward sleepovers girlfriend entitled clothes staying over entitled people borrowing not yours
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